Back to School / Growing up and moving on

Hey everyone!! I'm so happy today! I have actually started writing my blog posts and filming my videos weeks or even months in advance since I am back at school now and I so much work to do I can't think straight. (Nothing a cup of tea won't fix though *;)* ) I basically upload them all at once and schedule them to be posted on a certain day at a certain time so as to make sure you still get a blog post and a video every Monday.

Confused?...
Some of you right now might be confused about what I mean when I say 'just started school again'. Well, I shall explain it to you. I am - as you all know - from England. Yorkshire in fact. However, I moved to New Zealand about a year and a half ago and the school years over here start in February and end in November / December time. However I am a senior in College so I leave school in October and get a full 3 months off school (which is pretty awesome!)

Back to School...
Well for most of you, this blog post will be pointless till September but because I am going back to school now; I thought this would be the best time to do this blog post because you can always come back to this in September.
My first day back at school was literally today. I was scared out of my mind about being in classes with people I don't know and having new teachers and being in uncomfortable situations but apart from that, there was nothing much wrong with going back to school after a nice long break.
(You may also be wondering why I was scared. Well, I suffer with anxiety and it is particularly bad in school situations)
It turns out I had a really excellent first day.  I am taking Health, Photography, Classical Studies, Early Childhood Education, Maths and English. All these subjects are ones I am really passionate about and I love learning about. However, I do have some doubts. I took health in year 10 and 11 and really enjoyed it so decided to take it this year for year 12 but realised today that I'm getting pretty bored of it and am actually thinking about dropping it and then I will have a free period to finish off extra work etc. It's not that I don't like health and don't find it interesting but after two years of it, I'm just not sure if I want to do another two. All my friends who did health have also left to do bigger and better things.
Classical Studies is going to be amazing! We get to go to University lectures and visit the libraries there etc. I am SO excited for this year.

What's the problem then?...
What's the problem with all this amazing stuff and amazing opportunities? Well one simple little thing. At the end of next year, I leave school forever and never go back. This is scary as hell for me . I know that I will take a year out after year 13 to have a break from the education side of things and decide what I want to do with my life. As you know - I'm not that keen on going to University myself.
The thought of living by myself and paying the bills and cooking the food and being totally self-reliant scares me. I'm just not ready to grow up yet. I'm not ready to leave childhood behind and be an adult. Every time I think about it, it makes me feel a little ill. It's just all happening so fast and with no warning. You just wish time could slow down and you could be suspended in that moment forever. It would make things so much easier to deal with.


I also did a video on the same subject just a lot more rambling and a lot less coherency. I hope you enjoy.

Let me know your thoughts on growing up and moving on into the big wide world! I would love to know how you feel about it.
Love you all and see you next Monday,
Laralu x